I had a funny conversation with someone I'm close with recently.  We were talking about how she is dealing with our family member's illness.  How she's doing her best to cope and how little things like me bringing baking by brightens up their day.  That's nice.
Then it got a little weird because she starting telling me about how other people aren't really doing enough - I can hear that.  Really I can.  I also understand the other side of that coin though.  She then went on to explain that she purposely does not ask people for help - family or otherwise - because she wants to sit back and see who comes and helps of their own accord.  Because they care so much and it's so important to them.  Now again, I understand the argument I really do.  I just think it's dumb.
We don't ask for help.  We don't ask for anything if we can and then we get sick or we age or something happens and no matter whether we like it or not, we have to ask for help.  We have to rely on others.  So we're gonna have to get over it and it might as well be sooner rather than later.
I also think that most people are more than happy to help out.  Especially when there is an honest need and when the help is truly appreciated.  The problem is that we all get busy.  We're busy doing all kinds of crazy things.  We're busy living our lives.  Jobs.  Classes.  Homes.  Families.  Friends.  Cooking.  Working out.  Listening to music.  Reading.  You get the idea.  I think that most of us are willing but we don't have time to try and figure out what somebody needs and then go and do it for them.  It's not that we don't care it's just that it's so much extra work when we have to guess.
I, more than anyone, knows how hard it is to ask for help.  I'm terrible at it.  Really terrible.  Sometimes I simply don't know what to ask for even though I know that I need something.  I think that it's bred into us or something.  Like we'll be exposing our weakness or failure or something if we have to ask for help.  In principle though I think that it's important that we don't just wait until help is offered in order to ask for it.  It keeps us separated from each other, this not asking.  It denies people the opportunity to get to know me a little better or maybe in a way that they didn't know me before.  And it just feels good to be able to help someone else.  It's sharing not just giving... 'cause you get so much back.  I've got to give that some thought and learn to take my own damn advice.


On another note, my freezer is really dwindling now.  We are down to corn, peaches, blueberries, a few bananas and 1 portion of pesto.  I'm not feeling bad about it, it's a good thing.  Getting ready for the new season.  So when I saw this recipe originally for blueberries I thought that I should just try mixing it up a bit.  I chopped up some peaches as well and threw them in.  I suspect that raspberries would do nicely here as well.


Blueberry and Peach Buttermilk Cake adapted from Alexandra's Kitchen
makes 1  9 inch square cake

2 cups all purpose flour
2 tsp baking powder
1 1/2 tsp salt
1/2 cup unsalted butter at room temperature
3/4 cup + 1 tbsp sugar
1 lg egg
1 1/2 tsp vanilla
1/2 cup buttermilk
2 1/2 cup mix of blueberries and peaches (peaches should be peeled and diced)
2 tbsp sugar

Preheat oven to 350 degrees F.
Grease or line a 9 inch square baking pan and set aside.
Combine the flour, baking powder and salt together in a bowl and set aside.
Beat together the butter and sugar until light and fluffy.
Add in the egg and continue to beat until fluffy and well combined.
Add in the vanilla and mix well.
Add in the flour mixture and buttermilk in alternating batches.  Beginning and ending with the flour.  Take about 4 alterations with the flour.
Batter should be quite stiff.
Mix in the fruit and stir just until mixed.  Stir gently.
Pour the cake batter in the baking tin.  Smooth out the batter.  Sprinkle with the remaining 2 tbsp of sugar.
Bake for about 35 minutes or until a cake tester comes out clean.
Cool for about 7 minutes before removing from the cake tin.

This is what we did on Mother's Day... went for a walk.