I've inadvertently joined a book club at work.  I didn't know I was joining which is a long story in and of itself.  But, regardless, I've joined.
Of course the book that we're reading is... well, I'm sure that you can guess.  I just started the book yesterday.  My first conversation about the book was all about how much I'm gonna be blown away by chapter 7.  I can't say that I was waiting with bated breath or anything but I was curious.  So, for those of you who've read 'the book' (I really don't want to give the book any more press than it's already gotten - not that my blog will make a huge crap load of difference) you might understand how I was surprised to discover that the whole thing was basically a contract.  Sure it was a contract of the kind that we don't usually make a contract over... or do we.
I'd like to take this opportunity to declare that a contract regarding the terms of sex first of all isn't terribly erotic and secondly, isn't really a new concept.  In fact, I think that most of us create our own contracts when it comes to a serious relationship.  And we've been doing this for a really long time.  Marriage is our present day default contract.  It is legally binding and there are some pretty serious repercussions if we break the contract.  But sexual contracts have been around for a long long long time.  Pre-Judaism and Pre-Islam (and yes, I do realize that chronologically they are both VERY far apart) relationship contracts were quite deliberate and often quite different.  Our present day marriage contract is mostly straight-forward and inflexible (unless of course a pre-nuptual agreement is involved) but then 'marriage' contracts could take on just about any form.  For example, money could be left out of the contract completely, a couple could contract to be exclusive for a short period of time, a couple could agree that after a pre-set period of time that the contract would be renegotiated.  In other words, the terms were much more open ended than they are now.
When I read the contract in 'the book' I certainly didn't have a problem with the fact that a contract was being put on the table or the fact that there were some 'out of the ordinary' preferences being negotiated.  What bothered me was that the woman was not really being treated as an equal partner.  The contract was all about the preferences and limits required by the male in the relationship.  If we're getting into contracts and law and stuff then shouldn't the woman have taken the opportunity to say 'Thanks for this.  I'm going to go now and look it over and maybe talk to one of my lawyer friends (or not) and come back to you with a counter offer'.  The contract in 'the book' shouldn't necessarily have been taken as the end of the contract road but rather the beginning.  Relationships are all about negotiation - on a regular basis, always and forever, romantic or otherwise - and they should be about equality (especially when it comes to sexual relationships).  So a contract has to be flexible in order to be fair and equal.  Sure there will be some 'Never-do's' or 'Tap-outs' but otherwise it is negotiated and later possibly renegotiated and then again after that.
Now when it comes to 'the book', I'm only on chapter 8 so I definitely need to keep both an open mind and my fingers crossed that things get a little better for our heroine beyond some hugely satisfying 'coming of age' journal entries.
I'll keep you updated.


In the meantime, I'm trying to keep food in my kitchen and it seems to be mysteriously disappearing at an alarming rate.  I'm not sure where it's all going and in the middle of the week I found myself in the unfortunate position of having to get creative with these somewhat incongruous ingredients. The happy news is that after some deliberation... a little negotiational (not even sure if that's a word) coaxing maybe... this wonderful mess was the result.


Potato, Kale and Kitchen Sink Hash adapted generously from 'Simply in Season'
serves 4

6 - 7 small/med potatoes quartered or 'sixed'
1 onion or 3 spring onions, coarsely chopped
3 cloves garlic crushed
5 cups kale, coarsely chopped
1 lb sausage, cooked and coarsely chopped
1 boullion cube
1 tbsp grainy mustard
3 tbsp maple syrup
1 tsp salt
1 tsp pepper sauce or 1/4 tsp cayenne
2 tsp Worcestershire Sauce

Place potatoes in a pot and fill with water just until the potatoes are barely covered.  Bring to a boil and boil for about 7 - 8 minutes.  Drain but reserve about 1/4 of potato water.
Combine the reserved potato water, bouillon cube, mustard, maple syrup and Worcestershire sauce together.  Whisk until completely mixed and incorporated into a sauce.  Set aside.
Heat a large pot or wok over medium heat.  Add a couple of tbsp of your choice of oil.  Throw in the onion and garlic.  Cook together for about 2 - 3 minutes or until the onion is just starting to show signs of becoming soft.  Add in the kale and continue to cook for another 2 minutes, stirring constantly so the kale doesn't get stuck or burn - turn down the heat a little if necessary.  The kale should just be starting to wilt.  Add in the cooked potato and chopped sausage.  Mix well.
Turn the heat down a little more and toss in the bouillon/mustard mixture.  Stir everything until it's all coated with the sauce.  Cook for another 5 minutes or so over low heat.
Serve.