I celebrated christmas again recently with my best friend.
It was February and we had not seen each other since December 14th.
We got about an hour and forty five minutes together.
We live about 15 minutes away from each other.
This is sad.
I totally understand it and then I kind of don't. We are busy. We are so busy. There is always something. Even meeting up with my best friend I squished it in between going to the running track and a family movie night (to be fair, it was family day weekend so what's a girl to do?) We work. We parent. We hustle home. Then there is winter. And I remember how the same thing happened last winter. We got a nasty ice storm just a couple of days before christmas and that set the tone for the entire 80 days to follow. Cold, icy, snow and more snow... and nobody wanted to do anything because it just felt so hard to get anywhere. You really do feel like hibernating. The bare essentials - get to work - get food - and that is it. This year the winter hasn't been quite as brutal but it hasn't exactly been easy. The cold has been relentless this year. This has taken it's toll.
Here we are looking down the barrel of March. The calendar has just as many events on it as it did throughout February, maybe even more. And yet something feels just a little bit different in my soul. I've noticed that night time is not chasing my back on the way home from work. I looked at the forecast for this week and it looks like we have a couple of days that are sitting right around the 0C mark. We've got a tidy little week off nestled in about two weeks before easter long weekend. If I had to put a word on that barrel that I'm looking down right now (the one for March - remember?) it would be 'Promise'. Promise is a funny word because it is not a definite. March might not bring me everything that I am hoping it can but at least there is the hope.
Back to our hour and forty five minutes christmas celebration. My best friends gift had been sitting, ready and waiting for months... except for this. Her cookies. These I made on the day that we met. I made sure that they were just cooled enough that I could put them into little freezer bags - 3 to a bag, the perfect portion amount - so that she could take them home and freeze away. She loves this kind of thing and I love doing it for her.


I can tell you that these come together easily and would be great for a party when they would all get scarfed up. I wouldn't bother with them if it was a dinner party thing and there were lots of other courses that could over shadow these little delicacies though - plus who wants to bake cracker cookies when you have a whole dinner party to get ready for? Serve these cookies with some Boursin, Blue Cheese (if that's your thing) or a spreadable something or other. As part of an appetizer or tasting party  - olives, grapes, cheeses, meats, spreads - Lovely.


Oat and Parmesan Cookies adapted from thekitchn

1 cup old fashioned oats (I used quick oats BTW and it was fine)
1/4 cup warm water
1/3 cup olive oil
1/4 cup brown sugar
1 lg eggs (or two egg whites if you've just made ice cream and you've got extra whites hanging around looking for something to do)
1 cup unbleached, all purpose flour
1 tsp salt
1 tsp basil
1/4 tsp baking soda
1/4 tsp paprika
pinch black pepper
1 cup parmesan cheese grated (if you happen to throw in a little cheddar by accident I wouldn't be too upset)
coarse salt (maldon or sea salt)

Preheat oven to 350°F
Line a baking sheet with parchment or a silicon liner.
Combine the flour, salt, basil, baking soda, paprika and pepper together. Mix well and set aside.
Combine the oats and warm water and mix well.
Add in the olive oil and brown sugar and mix thoroughly until the brown sugar has dissolved.
Add in the egg and mix well.
Add the flour mixture to the oat mixture and mix until combined.
Add in the parmesan cheese and mix to combine.
Form into balls of about 1 1/2 tbsp or so then squish down into a cookie shape. Place on the baking sheet (they don't spread very much so they can be within an inch of each other) topping each with a little bit of coarse salt (might need to press it in a little)
Bake for about 15 - 17 minutes turning half way through baking. Cookies should be just turning golden brown at the edges.
Cool completely.

I have to start this post by stating that I have decided to experiment with using only 1 space after a period. This decision has been made in an attempt at hiding my age.
Looking back over my last few posts I have realised that there are only baked goods and sweets showing up here. It's given me pause to think about why that might be. Obviously we have cooked more than our fair share of meals and we have not been eating cookies and ice cream for dinner every night. Not any night in fact. I think that recently I have felt completely uninspired at best and disengaged at worst. The odd thing is that I have made some really good stuff. In the fall I let myself experiment with lamb by making a roast leg of lamb which turned out beautifully. A pork dish seasoned with a generous marinate of worcestershire and soy sauce, garlic, ginger and pepper sauce. Rave review. Recently I threw together some leftover roast chicken and slow cooked vegetables to make a pasta sauce. Beautiful. So why do I feel uninspired and apathetic about what I have churned out? And why don't I post about them even when they turn out well. Here are some of my ideas:
1. I don't feel like the pictures will turn out well. It is kinda hard to take an inspiring shot of sauce on pasta (am I wrong here?) or a hunk of meat on a plate... or in a roast pan. Perhaps I need to expand my photographic horizons or just start taking pictures of vegetables and leave it at that
2. I'm tired from making all the damn food (I don't actually think this is true) but I am tired
3. I don't even feel like eating the food myself (this is true unfortunately. Hummus and toast usually wins... and have I told any of you about my new obsession with grapes and cherry tomatoes?)
4. I am feeling uninspired and apathetic about life and I can't even blame winter for that one - although it certainly is not helping
5. My kids are using the computer too much. Perhaps I need to have my very own computer - one of these will do fine, thanks for asking
6. There is not enough room in my brain. I need an upgrade to get more space... or something needs to go to clear some space... no kids... no job... just tossing around some ideas. In truth, I think that this is probably the best answer so far.  It's not that there is no down time it's that the down time is still parenting and all the taxiing to this, that and the other in addition to the chores that need to get done - well that's not really head clearing time is it

These are some classy ass measuring cups that my Mom got me for Christmas.  Awesomest.

So there it is.  Mystery solved. Here is the funniest part - my kids don't even really like the stuff I'm baking. At least they are not terribly interested in eating it. I think they've grown totally accustomed to it and would much rather have a snickers bar than home baked cookies. I had to send about 80% of this snacking cake to school with kid #1. Her friends at school probably think that home baked stuff is a novelty and that it tastes much better than the orea cookies my kids are constantly begging for. She is 14 so after sharing with all of her friends I have some new love interests and someone else wants to make me a superhero costume... my super power being doing shit with bananas and chocolate - meh, could be worse.
For the record - I had to go back through this post and erase an extra space after almost every single period. Including the one in the first paragraph.


This was my original post idea... then I discovered that every single solitary photo I took blew huge chunks.
Banana oat snacking cake adapted form Bon Appetit
makes 1 8x8 square cake

1 1/2 cups oats (I used a combo of quick and classic rolled oats)
1 cup unbleached, all purpose flour
2 tsp baking powder
1 1/2 tsp salt
1/2 tsp cinnamon
dash nutmeg

1 1/4 cup brown sugar
2 eggs (I used 1 egg and 2 egg whites)
6 tbsp unsalted butter, melted
3 ripe bananas, peeled and coarsely chopped
5 oz dark chocolate, coarsely chopped (or use chips)

Grease and flour an 8x8 square baking dish. Set aside
Preheat the oven to 350°F
Combine the oats, flour, baking powder, salt and cinnamon together.  Mix until combined and set aside.
In a large bowl beat together the brown sugar and eggs until they are a creamy caramel colour and smooth.  About 2 minutes.
Add in the melted butter and beat together for another minutes.
Fold in the flour mixture just until all the ingredients are wet.
Gently fold in the chopped banana and chocolate.  Fold in just until mixed.
Pour into the prepared pan and spread evenly.
Bake for about 35 minutes, turning half way through baking.
Cool in pan for about 15 minutes before removing.  Cool a little longer before eating or don't... eat it warm... with ice cream... thank me later.

This is the recipe that goes with the photos you are seeing...
Pretzel, milk chocolate brownies adapted from Alice Medrich via Sassy Radish

1/2 cup all purpose flour
1 tsp salt
pinch of cayenne and a larger pinch of cinnamon
1/2 cup plus 2 tbsp unsalted butter
1 1/4 cup sugar
3/4 cup plus 2 tbsp dark cocoa
2 lg eggs cold
1 cup large chunks of milk chocolate
3/4 cup (or so) broken bits of pretzels

Preheat oven to 325°F
Line an 8x8 baking pan with parchment or butter and flour it and set it aside.
Combine the flour, salt and cinnamon together and set aside
Combine the butter, sugar and cocoa together in a heat proof bowl. Place over lightly simmering water and stir until butter is melted and everything is combined. It shouldn't be too hot and will be gritty looking.
Add the eggs one at a time whisking well after each addition. Once the mixture looks silky add in the flour mixture and whisk just until it's mixed in and you can't see flour anymore.
Poor the batter into the prepared pan. Sprinkle the chocolate chunks and the pretzels on top of the batter.
Bake for about 28 - 33 minutes (mine was done around 28 minutes) depending on how gooey you want your brownies.
Cool before removing from the pan - unless you think it's cool that they break apart like mine did.

It seems fitting that on this last day of summer I post these muffins.  There is just something right about it.  Cinnamon, cloves, nutmeg... it's screams 'Fall'.  Otherwise, there isn't a whole lot out there screaming Fall just yet... unless you count the Christmas crap all over the stores.
This weekend happened like many others - me having no plan whatsoever for what I want to accomplish.  I thought about painting a room... didn't happen.  I considered cleaning out the junk drawer... nope.  I did (fortunately) clean some clothes and get the floors swept a couple of times.  We also managed to throw in a play date.  Kid #2 has changed schools and now attends the same school where I teach/work - yes, that is just a little crazy.  Even though his old school is right across the street from us we haven't been able - for one reason or another - to get together with any of his old friends.  This past weekend though he got on the horn and had a friend over for a play date.  Play date sounds weird and formal.  They hung out together.  I don't particularly like play dates.  Mostly because it involves kids.  I don't hate kids or anything, I just don't particularly like them.  When I'm tired and it's been a long week it's even worse.  Kids are loud and messy and sometimes I just can't.  This weekend happened to be one of those times when I just couldn't.  Being a superlative Mom though means that you just suck it up once in a while and take one for the team.  As it turns out, indoor play dates can be wonderful motivation for me to get some much needed yard work done.  I happily spent a couple of hours of said play date outside while they yelled and had fun inside (so long as nothing gets broken I'm cool).  Two bags of clippings later and the yard looks great.  I suspect that if they had come outside my motivation might have disappeared.  It's possible that a mop and bucket might have looked tempting at that point - god knows, I wouldn't be able to turn on a tv screen without the couch magically filling up with kids.


I made these muffins before the play date.  Kid #1 knows now not to make a face when they ask what I'm baking and the answer is something involving fruit.  She knows because she has experienced my response on more than one occasion and she knows because she has tasted the results.  You can't always judge a book by it's humble, fruity cover.  Sometimes it tastes good.  Not every single thing has to have chocolate in it or on it.  She also knows that one bite will usually shut me up if I'm gotten all hissy about it.  Kid #2 - not so smart yet.  Doesn't even try to hide the face.  Won't even give that fruity thing a single bite.  Incurs the wrath of Mom every time.  The plate of muffins stayed on the table for the duration of the play date untouched.  Apparently mine aren't the only kids who believe that anything made without chocolate is probably not edible.  Comforting.


He ate a half a muffin before bed (couldn't stand the Mom attitude any more).  The entire half.



Apple Crumb Muffins adapted from Pip & Ebby

2 cups unbleached, all purpose flour
2 tsp baking powder
1 tsp salt
1/2 tsp cinnamon
1/8 tsp cloves
1/8 tsp nutmeg

2/3 cup brown sugar
1/3 cup sugar
1/2 cup unsalted butter at room temperature
2 eggs
1/4 cup (generous) milk or cream
1 1/2 cups (1 lg) apple, cored and cut into 1/2 inch cubes

Topping

1/2 cup unbleached, all purpose flour
1/2 cup oats (I used quick oats for this one)
1/3 cup brown sugar
1/4 cup melted butter

Preheat oven to 350°F
Line a dozen (or so) muffin cups with liners and set aside.
Combine the flour, baking powder, salt, cinnamon, cloves and nutmeg together.  Mix and set aside.
Combine the brown sugar, sugar and butter in a large bowl.  Beat (or mix) together until light and fluffy.  Add in the eggs and continue to beat until well incorporated and fluffy.  Add the milk or cream and mix well.
Add the flour mixture to the egg mixture.  Using a mixer or a large whisk continue mixing until the flour is completely incorporated and the mixture is thoroughly wet.
Add in the apples and fold until well mixed.
Fill muffin cups just to the upper edge.
Sprinkle each with about 1 1/2 tbsp (I used large spoonfuls) of topping and press it down just a little.
Bake for about 25 - 30 minutes or until a tester comes out of the middle muffins clean.
Cool before removing

Topping:
Mix the flour, oats and brown sugar together.
Add the melted butter and mix until it forms little clumps.  Set aside to use on the muffins.

And here we are... at the start of it all.  The first rhubarb recipe of the season.  I wish that I could tell you that it came freshly picked from my garden but I can't.  It didn't come from my garden.  It came from my freezer.  From last year.  How embarrassing.  How un-food-blogger of me.
The truth is that life has lately gone into end of school year mode.  Lots of papers to sign, dates to book, grad dress to shop for, uniform stuff to take care of for september - it's kept all of us hopping.  Coupled with that, every spare second has involved, ripping things out of our house, cleaning up the back yard, cleaning and bagging things for donation, painting, drilling holes and hanging important things... I can't even think clearly anymore.  Our neighbours are pretty happy with us though.  In the course of one week we have put 1 chest of drawers, 1 bookshelf, 2 chairs, 1 table, 1 large basket and 2 8lb weights on the front boulevard.  All of them were gone within a couple of hours.  I think the neighbours are now keeping watch on our front sidewalk to make sure they get first dibs.  Our kids are wondering exactly when we are going to stop and whether there will be any furniture left in the house when we do.

Please note the large power tool in the lower right corner.

To be honest I have no problem getting rid of things.  None.  I could live with very little quite happily.  I form very few attachments to stuff.  Not always a good thing but it does come in handy when you are going through your house with the purpose of getting rid of stuff.  It can be hard to stop once you've started though.  I'm at that point right now and I know that this means I have to be careful.  I can get out of control.  I can justify almost any toss out.  I'd love to say that I would regret it later but I wouldn't.  I might feel bad that someone else feels bad about it but I wouldn't miss the thing I tossed... like I said, not always a good thing.
All of this toss talk ties in nicely to the rhubarb... and I love a good tie in.  The rhubarb is in the freezer.  The freezer and fridge that it's connected to will be donated very soon to make way for the new-to-me appliances that my BFF is handing over.  I don't even want to talk about how excited I am about it... it's awesome and I have an awesome BFF.  So knowing that my freezer/fridge is on it's way out, I'm using this as an opportunity to clear through a lot of that stuff too.  Seeing as there is still another bag of rhubarb in the freezer you can look forward to another rhubarb recipe or two coming soon.


Blubarb Crumb Bars adapted from 'Sticky, Gooey, Creamy, Chewy'

Quick Blubarb Jam makes about 3 cups

4 generous cups chopped rhubarb
4 generous cups blueberries
3/4 cup brown sugar
1/2 cup honey


Crumb Stuff

1 cup oat flour (blitz old fashioned oats in a blender until it's a flour like consistency)
1 1/2 cups unbleached all purpose flour
1/2 cup buckwheat flour
1 1/4 cup sugar
1 tsp baking powder
1 tsp salt
pinch of cinnamon
1 cup cold, unsalted butter, cubed
1 egg

Preheat oven to 350°F
Line a 9x13 baking dish or pan with foil and butter it.
In a bowl combine all of the flours, sugar, baking powder, salt and cinnamon together.  Mix well.
Add the cubed butter and using two forks or a pastry cutter begin to cut the butter into the mixture.  Once it becomes fairly crumbly looking add in the egg and continue to cut everything together until the mixture is wet and crumbly.
Pat half of the flour mixture into the bottom of the prepared baking dish.  Pat down firmly
Spoon about 2 1/4 cup of blubarb jam over the bottom layer.
Evenly sprinkle the rest of the flour mixture over the blubarb layer.  Do not press this layer down.
Bake for about 40 min or until the top is light, golden brown.
Cool completely before cutting the bars (this gives the jam stuff time to firm up again)

It's been a while... a long while.  I've had this recipe sitting unpublished for a long time.  Truth is that things just got really busy.  This sounds lame I realize but it's the truth.  Another truth is that my kids have been using the computer a lot and once they are done using the computer it's late (or it feels like it) and my brain has nothing left in it (sad face).  Also, I've been away on tour with the crazy school I work for.  It's a concert tour of course, so while I'm chaperoning half of the grade 9 class I am also the designated stage manager for all concerts... easy right?  Then there's that other thing where my kitchen is getting slowly ripped out.  This is a good thing of course but it takes a long time and it's messy and although I'm really excited about what it's going to look like once it's done, it hasn't added to my kitchen malaise.  This brings me to yet another truth - my kitchen malaise.


I don't know what to do.  I don't care about eating or cooking or baking.  I'm phoning it in.  Going through the motions.  Looking after the bare necessities.  Reality is though that I have not even the remotest interest in getting creative.  I am being driven by pure need and nothing else.  The only redeeming moment was when I finally and (hopefully) forever jumped over the hurdle that is 'Trinidad Pelau'.  I think that I've got it... and yes, I will share eventually.  It is totally worth sharing.
Here I am sitting in my ripped up house, trying to feel happy that it's spring (I think... I hope) finally, hearing about garlic scapes and stinging nettle and whatever else is popping up out of the newly thawed earth and none of it is doing anything for me.  Not peaking my interest in the slightest.


I am equal parts hand wringing and apathetic.
I haven't even made ice cream.  This should give you some idea as to how serious the problem is.
I'm sure that this all will pass.  It will.  Meanwhile, about a month ago the banana convention in the freezer started to get rowdy again and I had to drum up something to do with them.  The freezer party happened to coincide beautifully with a popcorn blitz that kid #1 was experiencing.  I remembered reading a recipe that combined both with chocolate and managed to gather enough energy and inspiration to throw this cookie recipe together.

Who can resist a face like this?  I will admit to being inspired by it just a little.

Banana, Oatmeal, Chocolate Chunk, Popcorn Cookies adapted from 'Supernatural Everyday'
makes about 2 1/2 doz medium sized cookies

1 1/2 cups oats
1 1/2 cups unbleached, all purpose flour
1 1/2 tsp baking powder
3/4 tsp cinnamon
1 tsp salt

3 overripe bananas
1/4 cup unsalted butter at room temperature
1 egg
3/4 cups sugar
1 tbsp vanilla

1 cup chocolate chunks (dark chocolate - about 70% cocoa solids)
2 cups (approx) popped corn

Combine the oats, flour, baking powder, cinnamon and salt together.  Mix well and set aside.
Preheat the oven to 350°F.
Line a cookie sheet with parchment or a silicon liner.
Mix together (I used a hand mixer) the bananas and butter for about 1 minute or until the butter is completely combined with the banana.  Add in the egg and sugar and continue to mix until completely combined.  Add the vanilla and stir to mix.
Add the oat/flour mixture and mix together by hand until completely incorporated together.
Add in the chocolate and mix well.
Gently fold in the popcorn little by little until the batter can't take any more.
Drop onto the prepared cookie sheet in about 2 tbsp heaps leaving about 1 1/2 inches in between each mound.
Bake for about 14 minutes or until the cookies are turning golden at the edges.
Cool and store in an airtight container.

This winter has kicked my butt.  Like kicked it clear across the province or maybe even the country.  It's kicked me to the curb.  It's slapped me up one side of the head and down the other.  I think you get the idea.
As I claw my way through the last of it, still afraid to dwell on how it might end some day, it seems hard to remember that warm used to be a thing that described more than just huge sweaters and crazy thick socks.  It feels like I'm drowning in an ocean of clothing and I haven't seen my body in months.
Right now I am sitting in front of the computer in multiple layers and the thickest socks I could find... and slippers.  Fortunately, I am on March break at the moment which means that I can at the very least be sitting in front of the computer covered in so many layers that my arms can barely move in the middle of the day with the sun shining instead of 5:30pm in the dark (well not quite dark, I exaggerate just a little).
Before the break, I was about to run out and grab a coffee when I bumped into a colleague.  My colleague invited me to grab a coffee offered at a major fast food chain that was being offered for free that week.  Ummm Nope.  My colleague berated me for refusing the offer and accused me of being a coffee snob.  I decided that I'm ok with being a coffee snob and it drove home a thought that I've been mulling for a while now.
We are obsessed with wanting.  We want _________  (fill in the blank).  It's bred in us, male and female, from a young age.  We are constantly told what we want.  Every ad, every newspaper, magazine, website whatever, billboard tells us what it is we want.  Obviously, very few of us truly NEED anything.  What would happen if we all decided that we would only purchase what we needed as opposed to what we wanted?  Yikes - disaster.  My real problem with this wanting thing is that it's often indiscriminate.  I want chocolate.  Any chocolate will do as long as I can get chocolate... or just candy... or maybe just some form of sugar.  I want clothes so I will go to the mall and get some.  I don't need anything specific but I want clothes.  In fact, I just want.  I've decided that I'm ok with being picky and if that makes me a snob then I'm ok with that too.  I don't just want a coffee, any coffee, thank you very much.  If I can't have my own home ground, delicious coffee then there are only two places that I will ever get coffee from and if I can't get that coffee then I will skip coffee.  If I can't get the specific kind of chocolate that I am craving then I won't just buy anything to fill the void.  I will skip it altogether.  I know what I like, I know what I want and I know what I need... I don't care if that fast food chain is offering free coffee to me for the rest of my life.


Of course, this has nothing to do with these cookies.  I'm ok with that too.  I didn't eat any of these cookies unfortunately but my kids did.  They ate a lot.  I took a good solid dozen and a half to our friends place and still had plenty (about two dozen) leftover for home.  I don't know if you'll get that much out of this recipe, maybe my cookies were just exceptionally small.   They looked good, made a nice host gift and made my kids happy for a good few days.
Trust me, you WANT these cookies.


Triple Chocolate Oatmeal Cookies adapted from Kitchen Treaty
makes about 3 dozen med/small cookies

1/2 cup unsalted butter at room temperature
1 cup brown sugar
1 lg egg
1 tsp vanilla
1/2 cup all purpose flour
1/3 cup cocoa powder (I used dark 'Cocoa Camino')
1/2 tsp salt
1/4 tsp baking soda
1/2 tsp espresso powder
1 1/2 cups rolled oats
1 cup dark chocolate chunks or chips
1/3 cup white chocolate chips

Combine the flour, cocoa powder, salt, baking soda and espresso powder together and set aside.
Preheat the oven to 350° F
Line a cookie sheet with parchment or a silicon liner and set aside.
Mix together (I used a hand mixer) the butter and sugar until light and fluffy (about 2 1/2 minutes).  Add in the egg and vanilla and mix for another minute.
Gently add the flour mixture to the egg mixture and mix until combined.
Add the rolled oats and stir together until well mixed.
Add in both the white and dark chocolate and mix until evenly distributed.
Spoon onto the prepared cookie sheet using about 1 1/2 tbsp of cookie dough.  Leave a little room for the cookies to spread.
Bake for about 10 minutes or just until the outer edge of the cookies are beginning to brown but the middle is still kind of gooey.
Gently remove the cookies to a cooling rack.

It's officially winter and two weeks away from Christmas.  Two out of three December birthdays have passed and I have a total of 5 events left until I can breath a sigh of relief.  I've 'stretched' myself in new directions at work more than I ever thought I could.  I'm still biking and running out there in the cold (but I won't tell you I like it) and generally keeping active.  My kids are happy and doing well.  I should be contented and happy about all of this and I suppose that somewhere deep down I really am.  The problem is, I haven't been able to take it all in yet.  At least that's how it feels.  The pace just hasn't let up enough for me to absorb it.
Happily, the pace did not prevent me from making chocolate mousse cake for D's birthday.  Add to that the sweet and sour meatballs meal that was requested (we do that for birthdays - favourite meal kinda thing)  It also did not keep us from ordering a lovely flower arrangement for my Mom's birthday... but that was thanks to D.  In fact, D is doing a lot of things right now while I learn how to stage manage concerts and organize events and get Cantors ready for Christmas Masses.  D is getting the tree (and possibly trimming it).  D has ordered the Ham (and will probably be picking it up too).  D has organized our Christmas Day family get together.  Guess who's going to be doing the bulk of the christmas shopping?  If it weren't for D then I would be treeless, presentless, hamless mess on December 20th.  As we slowly approach the 20th, I try not to dwell too much on how awesome that first sleep in and morning coffee is going to feel because then I get more depressed.
One of the things that I'm looking forward to most is being able to take a day or two (or four) and bake.  I don't want to eat the baking.  Couldn't care less - I just want to bake and for some reason the thought of baking cookies holds the most anticipation.  I can't wait to make my traditional christmas cookies and this year I want to add my Grandmother's shortbread to the list.  I want to have the ingredients surrounding me and be stirring and mixing and breaking eggs.  I want to feel the warmth of the oven and hear the comforting tick of the timer.  I want to see all of those cookies piled up into containers and enjoy how lovely they all look together.

Just a part of the cookie carnage.

I made these cookies in a one hour window on a Sunday afternoon where I had both time and light on my side.  Barely though and in my haste to get a photo of the cookies I dumped a few on the floor... it happens.  These will be a lovely addition to anyone's christmas cookie party and I might even make them again before the year is out.  However, I will make sure that when I carry them out to take pictures that I walk carefully.  Also, kids will eat molasses cookies when you put white chocolate in them.  FYI.


Molasses and White Chocolate Cookies adapted (slightly) from Peabody
makes about 3 dozen med/small cookies

2 cups unbleached, all purpose flour
1 cup oats (old fashioned)
1 tsp baking soda
1 tsp salt
2 tsp ginger (I used fresh but ground is fine)
1 tsp cinnamon
1/4 tsp nutmeg
pinch of cloves
3/4 cup unsalted butter at room temperature
3/4 cup brown sugar
1/2 cup molasses
1 lg egg
1 tsp vanilla
1 cup (scant) white chocolate chips
1/4 cup sugar - the coarser the better (mix with a little cinnamon)

Combine the flour, oats, baking soda, salt, ginger, cinnamon, nutmeg and cloves together.  Mix and set aside.
Beat together the butter and brown sugar for about 3 - 4 minutes or until light and fluffy.  Add the molasses and continue to beat for another 2 minutes.  Add the egg and vanilla and beat until combined (about 1 1/2 minutes)
Add the flour mixture to the molasses mixture and stir/mix to combine completely.  Add in the white chocolate chips and mix evenly.  Cover completely with plastic wrap and refrigerate for about 4 hours (or overnight)
Preheat the oven to 350°F
Line a cookie sheet with parchment or a silicon liner.
Scoop spoonfuls (I used about a tbsp and a half) of dough onto the cookie sheet.  Press each cookie down a little and sprinkle with the cinnamon sugar
Bake for about 10 minutes - cookies may be a little softish in the centre but the edges should be just turning brown.
Remove and cool.
Store in a airtight container.

That moment when you are about to write a blog post because something, some silly little thing, inspired you and then you realise that you haven't typed in the recipe yet.  Yup.  Sunk.  I only typed in part of the recipe.  The easy part.  My Heart sinks.
You see, this recipe has been kinda doomed since the beginning.  To start with, I really didn't have enough peaches.  I should have used fresh ones.  It would be best with fresh ones.  Then you look at the muffins with all of that muesli on top and they look too damn healthy.  You know, all of that doomed crap.  We were all underwhelmed by them.  They wanted to be more, they wanted to be spiced and spruced.  Add in a dash of cinnamon and cardamom or something exciting.  If you're a food blogger then you can go ahead and do that for me.  Post the recipe and you can say that you 'adapted' your recipe from me.  That would be cool.  You have my permission.  The one thing that these muffins were is fluffy.  I tried a half of one.  Kid #1 had a whole one.  Done.  I contemplated taking them to work but then I didn't feel like 'cause I only want to share with people I like and that can get kind of sticky.  So they just got eaten ridiculously slowly and then not eaten at all.
Then I saw these adorable pictures from this other blogger who posted peach muffins.  Which is cool because our muffins are different (whatever) and yeah, that totally happens in the blogosphere.  And her pictures make me think that maybe I should put cute little bears or butterflies in my pictures.  I'm completely rethinking my photo focus and feeling super second rate... maybe balloons would be nice.

Not an adorable plastic pig in sight.

Let's not even talk about how it's not really even peach season anymore.  Fresh peaches are a thing of the past here.  This gets me feeling super depressed that I haven't canned one single thing this year.  Not one.  Nothing.  Truth is, I can't face it.  The thought of doing 4 bushels of tomatoes is making me want to leave my lunch in the toilet.  But it still doesn't prevent me from feeling the loss and failure of leaving it out of my life completely.  D has given me permission to let it go - he doesn't think that I get an F for buying canned tomatoes this year.  That's a relief.  So, there it is.  Bye Bye peach season.
Then my weekend was a total write-off.  Ended up having to work.  Ended up being a single parent.  Ended up seeing a friend go into the hospital with an emergency brain aneurysm.  Ended up feeling ridiculously sorry for myself.  Ended up looking for therapists online.  So by 10pm Sunday night when I really only had that tiny little morsel of inspiration to go on, the floor dropped out from under me when I realised that I still needed to type in the recipe instructions.   I keep telling myself to type it all in when I first make it so that it's all done.  You never go back to it later... or you hate yourself when you do.  And yet, here I am again.
So I'm deciding that life is short and if I'm going get all up in my freak about this then I'd better just have a beer and go to bed which will definitely help with depression.  I'll call the therapist in the morning.

Oh Look - a piece of peach.

If you happen to live somewhere that is still experiencing fresh peaches.  If you happen to be someone who canned peaches and would like some ideas on how to use them up.  Hell, if you froze a few peach slices... then try this out.  Make sure you have enough peaches.

Muesli... yawn

Peach Muffins with Muesli Streusel adapted from Baking Bites
Makes about 14 lg muffins

1 1/2 cups all purpose flour
3/4 cup whole wheat or red fife flour
2 tsp baking powder
1/2 tsp salt
1/2 cup brown sugar
1/2 cup sugar
1 egg
4 egg whites (or 1 more egg if you don't have egg whites handy)
1 cup milk
1/4 cup + 1 tbsp unsalted butter, melted
1 tbsp vanilla
1 1/2 cups peaches (frozen or fresh), skins peeled and diced into 1 inch cubes and tossed in a tbsp or two of flour.

Topping
3/4 cup muesli or granola (no sugar)or oats
1/4 cup sugar
1/4 tsp cinnamon

Preheat oven to 350° F
Line between 12 and 14 muffin cups with liners and set aside.
Combine both the flours, baking powder and salt together.  Mix and set aside.
Whip the egg whites (if using) until semi-stiff peaks form (about 5 minutes or so depending on what you are using to whip them).  Set aside.
In a large bowl combine both of the sugars and the egg (or 2 if you are not using egg whites).  Whip together until fluffy.  Add in the milk and melted butter.  Whisk until well mixed.  Add the vanilla and mix.
Add the flour mixture to the sugar and egg mixture.  Whisk until the dry ingredients are thoroughly incorporated.  If using egg whites, gently fold them in until they are well incorporated.  Gently fold in the peaches.
Fill each muffin cup to the brim.

Combine all of the topping ingredients together.  Sprinkle on top of each unbaked muffin tin.
Bake the muffins for about 25 - 30 minutes or until they're turning golden on the sides and a cake tester comes out of the middle muffin cup clean.
Cool and eat.

The starting gun has gone off and the race has begun.  Everything back to normal - at least, what that normal is for ten months of the year.  I know that there are a lot of mixed emotions for people at this time of year and it doesn't necessarily mean that you and/or a dependant are heading back to work or school.  I'll be honest with you, I'm usually at the bitchy, grouchy, having-bed-head end of the spectrum.  Things are changing though.  I am making a conscious choice this September to grit my teeth and be okay with it all.
Think of everything that we no longer have to think about.
Routine:  We no longer have to decide when to get up (or not) and when to go to bed (or not) and when to eat (or not).  The worry of it all has been taken off of our hands.
Bills:  For those of us on a ten month contract, by the time we get to the end of August we are frantically calling banks and credit companies deferring payments and scraping change out of the kids piggy banks to buy milk.  We look longingly through the window of the dollar store and wonder what it might be like to have disposable cash to spend in said shop.  Canned beans become our best friend and we figure that things like meat and toilet paper can wait.  For us, as of today that knot in your stomach can disappear (well maybe after the first paycheque).
Penmanship classes:  All of those cheques we are writing for school uniforms, karate, piano lessons - Yes, those cheques mean that we no longer have to be concerned with our failing penmanship.  After a week or so our writing is back in top form.
Keeping track of time:  You know how in the summer we so easily forget important dates - birthdays, anniversaries, etc.  We don't even know what holiday you are celebrating because every day feels like a holiday.  Maybe we've slept through two days.  Once September hits that's all behind us.  We live by your calendar.  In fact, we may have to have your calendar on our person at all times.  No worries about forgetting our own birthday... or sleeping through it.
Cream:  We no longer have to wonder about whether we have enough cream for our morning coffee because we no longer have our morning coffee at home.  We have our morning coffee once we get to work or maybe in the quiet, bliss of our very own car on the way to the job or school that we love.

No more worries about which flowers make you sneeze.

Overeating: (Not that this was a worry for anyone of us in the 'Bills' category) The summer is time for sweet indulgence.  When we are not sleeping or drooling on the couch, we are usually eating.  There is so much ice cream and watermelon, BBQ'd burgers and kebabs, pasta salads and grilled eggplant.  How is anyone supposed to stop?  And there is nothing but time.  Time to eat.  That worry is now long behind us.  Things will stop growing soon and it doesn't matter anyway because we don't have time to stop and eat.  Most days it's 1:44 in the afternoon before I remember to eat and then I'm in the middle of a class or a meeting or a client call.  We swallow some hummus at 3:50 and two leaves of lettuce (not in season) at 6:45.  That's called a diet people.


So, as you can see, I have decided to make a 180° turn and become an optimist.  I'm pretty sure that this  optimism is gonna last too.
In the spirit of optimism and less to worry about, I give you banana cake which is totally healthy because it's got all this brown flour that's going to make you happy and believe in the existence of unicorns.


Red Fife and Buckwheat flour Banana Cake adapted from Attune Foods and A Sweet Spoonful
makes 1 9x9 cake

1 cup Red Fife flour
1 cup less 2 tbsp Buckwheat flour
2 tbsp all purpose flour
1tsp baking soda
1/2 tsp salt
1/2 tsp cinnamon
1/4 tsp cardamom
3/4 cup sugar
1/2 cup unsalted butter at room temperature
2 eggs
1 cup (about 3 med bananas) ripe, mashed banana
1 tbsp vanilla
1/2 cup buttermilk (or 1/4 cup milk mixed with 1/4 cup plain yogurt)
1/2 cup granola, muesli or oats
icing sugar for sprinkling

Preheat oven to 350°F
Butter and flour a 9x9 baking dish.
Combine all of the flours, baking soda, salt, cinnamon and cardamom together.  Mix well and set aside.
Whisk together the sugar and butter until fluffy.  Add the eggs and continue to whisk until completely incorporated.  Add the ripe banana and mix well.  Add the vanilla and mix.
Add the flour mixture to the banana mixture.  Mix until the flour is completely incorporated with no lumps.
Add the buttermilk and continue to whisk until completely mixed.
Add the granola and mix.
Pour the mixture into the prepared pan.
Bake for about 35 minutes, turning the pan half way through.  The edges of the cake should be pulling away from the edges and a cake tester should come out clean.
Cool for about 10 minutes and remove the cake from the pan and cool on a cooling rack.
Sprinkle with icing sugar once cooled.

I'm totally distracted by lots and lots of things in my life.  At the moment my big distraction is that I have no one to go to a concert with me.  I'm gutted.  I desperately want to go and see Kate Nash who is in town next week.  I sent a call out to my cyberworld friends and sadly, have gotten no response.  D is not into K enough to go to the show although, to be fair, we haven't talked about it yet.  Kate is definitely just weird enough to be just a smidge inaccessible to most pop-loving north americans but not weird enough to make it into the super fringe crowd.  Her music speaks to me.  She seems unafraid to be a 'hysterical' female.  I'm itching to go and it's my March Break week... do I go by myself... it's pretty late in the night... I'd feel weird standing there alone...
Then I thought about how far the tables have turned... and in the weirdest way.  When I was in university I was the girl that didn't go out.  I stayed home.  I put my favourite CD in the disk player and plugged in the headphones.  I would lie on the couch and get lost in the sound.  I would read.  I would go to church.  I would grab the local and free newspaper and read about what was going on... I would never do it.  My friends would ask me to do stuff... I wouldn't.  Sometimes I would go to a movie - usually either while I was supposed to be in class (ie. during the day) or at midnight (I wasn't afraid of the movie theatre... just of some movies).  Mostly I went to friends places for dinner if I did anything at all.  Once.  ONCE!  My friend dragged me kicking and screaming (and terrified on the inside) to a Bare Naked Ladies concert.  It was fun but I felt lost, I didn't know what to do.
It's taken me many years to be okay with not knowing what to do, to stop worrying about whether I looked the part and to actually let myself want to do something.  I am now at the stage of life when most of us slow down - kids, work, home - and yet now I feel finally ready to get out there and do somethings.  Let me be clear, I still don't want to do a lot.  I'm not and probably never will be much of a party person.  But there are some things that I just want to do.


It's weird how life does that to you.  Just when you feel good about yourself and you're ready to put it out there you discover that your boat just set off from dock and you're scrambling to find another solution.  I don't know if you've ever found yourself in that situation.  Wondering how it is in your circle of friends or in your family that you are the only one who's giving a crap about some special thing or whatever.  Thing is, I'm one week away from a great show and I've got no date.  Should I consider hiring someone?  Do I ask someone to go who doesn't know KN at all - then I have to explain her or feel all apologetic when she's not what they expected.  Do I just not go?  I can get her music online after all... it's not the end of the world right?
While contemplating my dilemma I made these muffins.  Muffins are still weird for me because I feel like they are cupcake's boring cousin except... they're not.  Aside from not rising as much as I might have preferred in a perfect muffin world, these were great.  I sat with a cup of coffee (which I'm drinking again for those with an interest) and let the carrot muffin pieces in my mouth lull my into a false sense of 'ok'.


Whole Grain Carrot Muffins adapted from Good to the Grain
makes about 8 - 10 medium sized muffins

Streusel: (I only used about half of this for the muffins - the other half can go in the freezer for next time)
1/4 cup + 2 tbsp spelt flour
2 tbsp oat bran (I used quick oats instead)
3 tbsp brown sugar
1 tbsp sugar
1/2 tsp salt
3 tbsp (or so) cold, unsalted butter, cubed

Muffins:

1 cup spelt flour
3/4 cup unbleached all purpose flour
1/4 cup oat bran (I used a mixture of bran and quick oats 'cause that's what I had)

1 tsp allspice
1 tsp cinnamon
1 tsp salt
1/4 tsp nutmeg
1 1/2 cups carrots, shredded
1 cup buttermilk
1/4 cup unsalted butter, melted and cooled slightly
1 egg

Combine the streusel ingredients in a bowl and using your fingers, pinch together the ingredients until they form a crumbly texture.  Do this quickly and then set aside in the fridge until needed.
Preheat the oven to 350°F.
Line a muffin tin with about 10 liners and set aside.
Combine the flours, oat bran, both sugars, allspice, cinnamon, salt and nutmeg together.  Mix just until combined.  Add the shredded carrots and mix until the carrots are mixed and coated with the dry ingredients.
In another bowl combine the buttermilk, melted butter and egg together and whisk until the ingredients are combined and just a little frothy.  Add to the flour mixture and stir together just until everything has incorporated to form a wet batter.
Fill each muffin cup just to the brim with the batter.  Sprinkle a generous amount of streusel on top of each muffin (about 2 tbsp or so, if you can manage it).
Bake for about 32 - 35 minutes, turning half way through baking.
Cool slightly before removing from the pan.
Keeps for about 2 days.

I realize that making mistakes is not just a part of life but an integral part of learning.  I know at every level of my being that I am not perfect and make mistakes frequently.  We tell our kids (especially Kid #1 because she's at that age) that not only are the mistakes going to happen but that they should motivate you to continue learning so that you don't make the mistake again.  And despite all of this, I absolutely HATE making mistakes.  It doesn't matter when, where, how, why or what happens.  Nothing altars how much I hate it when I make a mistake.
I've made a lot of mistakes lately.  Things like not biking to work when I should have because I thought that the weather might be bad but it wasn't.  Not letting the kids finish a sentence before interrupting them with some sort of answer.  Giving one of the choirboys the wrong music to work on because I didn't read the service music properly.  You get the idea.  Making mistakes when it comes to food has the effect of seriously altering what we'll be eating for the week.  If something doesn't work then either I have to make something else or we just go without.  The last time I tried pumpkin bread it failed miserably.  MISERABLY.  The gooey, puddingy mess was almost unsliceable.  Yuck.  I put the rest of the pumpkin puree in the freezer and took a break.  We needed some distance.  The damn stuff stayed in my psyche though.  Every time I read yet another food blog with some kind of devastatingly gorgeous incarnation of pumpkin bread I would cringe.  Every time I walked into a Starbucks and saw their pumpkin bread I would curse to myself.  The wound was still smarting.
Today was the day.  The day where I be the example to my kids.  The day where I put my money where my mouth is.  The day where I pulled out that pumpkin puree and tried again.  I was careful this time.  So careful.  I didn't watch a Bollywood film or any other film/tv or screen involved device - well, except for the recipe itself.  The kids both read quietly in the other room.  D was out at a rehearsal.  There were no excuses.  This was going to be it.  If this didn't work for me then I was done.  If I used pumpkin puree again it would either be in a sheet cake form or muffin, something smaller, thinner and therefor easier to get a better texture.


When the loaf was done baking (and I left it in for longer than I should have probably), I waited impatiently for the loaf to cool.  A lot of nail biting was happening.  I worked hard to distract myself for the appropriate period of time.  I kept checking it, feeling the pan, sticking the tester in.  Hell, if I thought that putting it in the fridge would've worked, trust me, I would've gone for it.  Thankfully an hour or so was all I had to suffer through.  I can't imagine it being any longer.  I was finally time to place the bread out onto the cutting board and put knife to loaf.  It was agonizing.  I can't remember being so anxious about the outcome of a baked good.  The first slice would seal it, if there was any sign of goo then I would throw my hands up and then wash them of all pumpkin loaves ever again.
Then it happened.  All of a sudden the first slice was done.  Then the second and the third.  There was no goo.  No goop, no squish.  I didn't need to wring it out.  Textural success!  But how did it taste?  I broke off a little piece and it was... GOOD.  I loved it in fact.  I ate the rest of the slice just to make sure that first bite wasn't an aberration.  Nope, it was all good.


And that, my friends, means that I have now achieved pumpkin bread redemption.  I can now hold my head high in a room of food bloggers or home cooks.  I can stare into that case at Starbucks and give that bread the brush off.  Doesn't intimidate me anymore.  My kids are getting their real life lesson about dealing with mistakes while they eat the results of my tenacity.


Whole Wheat Pumpkin and Applesauce Bread adapted from weeklygreens
makes 1 loaf

3/4 cup unbleached all purpose flour
3/4 cup whole wheat flour (I used Red Fife in mine)
1/2 tsp baking soda
1/4 tsp baking powder
1 tsp salt
1 1/2 tsp cinnamon
1 tsp ginger
1/2 tsp allspice
1/4 tsp nutmeg
2 lg eggs OR 1 egg and 2 whipped egg whites (thank you homemade ice-cream)
1 cup canned or pureed pumpkin or winter squash (if it's homemade you might want to drain it a bit through a sieve so that it's as dry as possible)
1/2 cup applesauce (unsweetened or barely sweetened)
1/2 cup brown sugar
1/4 cup (4 tbsp) melted butter or coconut oil

Streusel topping:

3 tbsp whole wheat flour
1 - 1/2 tbsp quick oats or oat bran
2 tbsp brown sugar
1 tsp sugar
dash of salt
2 tbsp cold, unsalted butter, cubed

Combine all the ingredients.  Using your thumbs pinch together until the mixture forms a crumb.  Should be lumpy and holding together.  Set aside.

Preheat oven to 350°F.
Grease and flour a regular sized loaf pan and set aside.
Combine the whole wheat flour, all purpose flour, baking soda, baking powder, salt, cinnamon, ginger, allspice, and nutmeg.  Mix well.  Set aside.
Optional: Whip the egg whites (if you haven't already) until light, fluffy and nearly stiff (will have at least doubled in size)
Combine the egg(s) - not the egg whites if using - pumpkin puree, apple sauce, brown sugar and melted butter.  Mix well until all the ingredients are combined.  Add the flour mixture to the pumpkin mixture.  Mix well.  Add in the egg whites and whisk in slowly until combined.  Pour into the prepared loaf pan and bake for 45-50 minutes.  After 25 minutes of baking add the streusel topping and continue baking for the remaining 20 minutes or until a tester comes out clean.  Allow to cool completely before slicing.

I'm writing this post while waiting for Kid #1 to get herself to the shower.  This sounds utterly backwards but, if you can believe it, I've scheduled it with her since last night.  Twenty four hours later and my frustration is reaching proportions.  It feels like I'm forcing a dog into soapy water.  You have to hold the dog there, getting yourself thoroughly wet and soapy in the process, just to get it done.  Admittedly, there are many things about twelve year olds that I find perplexing and, as a parent, infuriating.
Here are a few of the things that I find absolutely confusing:
Sleeping - We don't sleep at night, we sleep in the morning.  Unless it's a weekday and then we must get up at 6:15.  If, by some strange fluke, our alarm does not go off and we wake up at 7 a.m. then we must run downstairs in tears using our loudest foot stomp and wailing about how our Mother (saint that she is) was supposed to wake us up because she must know that we get up at 6:15 EVERYDAY.
Eating - We eat all of the meals served to us by our saintly and gorgeous Mother (except maybe breakfast if we've slept in and are very upset) but we also eat snacks.  Lots of snacks. And we like to eat them right after our meal.  Or before our meal.  Or anytime.  We get our own snacks.  We never get our own meals.
Cleaning - Since we have to do our own laundry we choose to simply not do it.  Unless of course, we are threatened with the loss of something we hold dear.  Smelly clothes, especially underthings, do not factor into our decision about when laundry is necessary to do.  The same logic applies to cleaning our room (i.e. 'mess' is not a factor in deciding how much and when we clean) and generally any mess we make throughout the house.
Dress - 90% not important mostly because all of our clothes (decent or otherwise) are either in our dirty clothes hamper, on our floor or under our bed.  It is 99% probably that you will not find any article of clothing that we actually wear either on a hanger or folded and in a drawer.


I could go on but I think that you get my point.  Do I remember being twelve, you ask.  A little.  I remember wearing winter clothes in the middle of the summer (hot summer) because I liked how they felt on my body. (Pin Stripe Jeans were the thing)  I remember eating a whole bag of chips after school.  I remember having incredible amounts of energy when I was with my friends and being overwhelmingly lethargic once I got home.  I do have a certain level of understanding and I know that this is a phase.   Just for the record, I'm ready for the phase to pass so that we can move on to thirteen and see what that holds.
While I wait impatiently I'm making bread.  Bread helps with patience.  It doesn't require heavy labour or deep thought.  Just patience.  That's just what I needed last weekend.  I'm pretty sure that I've posted copious amounts of bread with oatmeal and honey on this blog.  I'm going to justify my repetition by telling you that making this bread made a goodly portion of my day feel a little more sane.  The calmness that it provided my addled nerves with allowed me to complete everything that I needed to with a smile and a sense of balance.  That alone makes it worth posting... and I think that I finally hear the shower running.


Oatmeal Red Fife Bread adapted from 'Good to the Grain'
makes 1 large loaf

2 1/2 cup whole wheat or red fife flour
2 cups unbleached, all purpose flour or bread flour
1 cup rolled oats
1 tbsp salt
2 cups warm water
2 1/4 tsp (1 pkg) dry yeast
1 tbsp sugar
1 tbsp unsulphured molasses
2 heaping tbsp honey
1/4 cup unsalted butter, melted

Combine the flours, rolled oats and salt together and set aside.  (Since I am kneading by hand I kept about a 1/2 cup of the all purpose flour back to save for kneading - if you are using a mixer then you don't need to do this)
Combine the warm water, sugar and yeast together.  Mix and set aside in a draft free spot to bloom (or you could do this in the bottom of the bowl of your stand mixer if you are using one) for about 10 minutes.  It should be bubbly, yeasty smelling and have risen somewhat.
Once the yeast has bloomed combine the flour mixture, the yeast mixture and the melted butter.  Mix together using a wooden spoon until everything is incorporated.  Cover with a clean cloth and set aside for 30 minutes.
After 30 minutes, start kneading the bread  - by hand: adding the reserved flour as needed for about 10 - 15 min./by machine: adding tablespoon or two if the dough gets sticky for about 6 min. on medium.  The dough should be slightly tacky and soft.
Place the dough in a buttered/greased stainless steel or glass bowl.  Cover and let rise for about an hour (or until doubled in size) in a draft free spot.
To form the dough: Butter/grease a large loaf pan OR line a baking sheet with parchment or a silicon liner.
Punch down the dough and form into a loaf sized log and place in the loaf pan OR into a dome shape and place on the parchment or silicon.  Cover with a clean cloth and place in a draft free spot to rise for about an hour (dough should have risen half it's size again and be just over the edge of the loaf pan)
After about an hour preheat the oven to 400°F.
Bake for about 40 minutes (rotating once through the baking) until the bread is dark on the top.  Use the knock test (the bread should sound hollow if you knock it).
Cool completely before slicing.